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Where things stand

November 17, 2010 on 10:55 am | In Uncategorized | No Comments

It’s been two and a half years since my surgery, and I can honestly say it’s been an amazing time.

After I got over the first round of complications, I had a hard time comprehending my rapid weight loss. One hundred pounds in six months! It’s difficult to wrap your head around that one—your mind plays tricks on you like you wouldn’t believe. I wore baggy clothes all the time, to the point where my friends would just come out and tell me I looked ridiculous, that I needed to go shopping. But in my mind, I was still heavy enough to fit into those clothes, and it took a long time for my head to catch up with my body.

Now, I’m more aware of the changes, and I’m not going to lie, it feels great. The holidays are coming up, and for once I am not scrambling to find something decent to wear. I go to the department store and I have a variety of choices to pick from. It is awesome.

But even more wonderful than my newfound fashion independence is just the simple relief of not being a slave to food. I’m no longer trapped in that vicious binge eating cycle, and that means more than number on the scale. People often as me about the physical part of losing weight, like if I can now move around easier, or if my breathing is now under control. And yes, those things are important, but saying goodbye to food addiction is by far the best part of this experience so far, hands down.

Does that mean I am done? No…and that’s okay, too. After the initial 153 pound weight loss, I tacked on 15 pounds this summer due to yet more health problems (more on that soon!). But the difference is…I didn’t panic. I didn’t even really care, to be honest. The health problems have somewhat abated, and now those 15 pounds are gone. I’m left now with the remaining weight loss I’d like to achieve, about 50 pounds or so. And I’m excited, instead of anxious. I’m inspired, instead of desperate. If I lose the weight, great. If not, I know I can live right where I am—free of diabetes, free of hypertension, and by God, free of food addiction.

That feeling, folks…..I have no words.